Return To Self

Today is an auspicious day. Why? I decide.

Just like any other day, it’s all about how we choose to live. 

I was recently reminded of one of my favorite characters (Chirrut Imwe) from Rogue One: A Star Wars Story and the mantra he lives by:

“I am one with the force, and the force is with me” 

Call it what you wish, but this force of divine energy dances deep within every living thing on this planet and connects us all in a way we can only begin to comprehend. It is known within the core of each beating heart, and perhaps simultaneously misunderstood due to its perceived complexity.

But the full connection with this force is rarely experienced. It may seem too confusing to the rational mind, too unknown to the survival brain, or too powerful to the broken heart.

And yet, this force (perhaps love) remains constant, welcoming us home upon each return. 

Are you open to this kind of love? A deep intimacy with life, including yourself.

It seems as though the common denominator of the quality of one’s life can be seen through the level of connection with the true self, or in other words the degree of separation from who you really are.

Lately, I’ve been pondering three questions that seem to expose this tone of separation. Perhaps you can spend some time exploring them as well.

  1. When did loving myself become scary, painful, uneasy? 
  2. When did trusting myself become something I had to prove? 
  3. When did accepting myself become an obstacle I had to overcome?

The irony in this all is that for most people the absence of love is more familiar than the expansive feeling of an open heart. To no fault of their own, this is the way in which they perceive life based on faulty expectations and prior experiences.

Sometimes it’s hard to see how caught up in the game we are, or the degree of separation from our truth. Nowadays, it almost feels as though every part of us is being exposed, purging false identities and mistruths every waking hour. 

But guess what? There’s nothing to prove, nowhere to go, and nothing that needs to be done. It’s all a choice. To live by this set of rules, which embodies freedom over restriction, you must be willing to stand out. Courageous enough to follow your heart, rather than the drumming beat of mass conformity. To say ‘Yes’ to yourself, and follow that spark of passion, knowing you are loved and supported more than words can even begin to describe.

Better yet, YOU ARE LOVE.

It takes a willingness to start something new, choosing not to continue any longer on a path of disrespect towards yourself (although familiar). More importantly, however, is to be aware that thoughts of shame, guilt and resentment towards yourself are likely to surface when you decide to change.

Welcome them with open arms – after all, it’s a choice.

We’re so afraid of how we will be perceived by others, and yet by not allowing ourselves to live through our heart’s desire we end up hurting ourselves even more.

There’s so much freedom in not caring what others think, and even more freedom in not caring what your own ‘thinking mind’ thinks (i.e. embarrassment, guilt, shame). These are stories that are generated and fed into by generations of heartache, sadness, and pain.

I sometimes stop myself and ask, “When did I need things to be different in order to feel ok?” This inevitably leads to the following set of questions below. Are you willing to answer them truthfully?

  1. What do I actually want in life?
  2. How do I honestly enjoy spending my time?
  3. Am I willing to feel everything this life has to offer? 

Decide how you wish to experience the feelings of grief, sadness, and isolation.

Choose how you wish to embody your creativity, passion, and joy.

Whichever path you choose, remember it’s all up to you. You are the absolute in the equation. You are the common denominator in all of your life experiences.

You are one with the force, and the force is with you.

So return to your breath, return to your power. For you are always becoming more and you will never get it all done. 

This is the way…

With great love,

Dr. Ryan

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